Calmness and Class
By Erin
A year and a half ago, I started a new job as a behavior technician at an Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) Center. After nearly 50 hours of training, I started working with young kids on social skills, communication, and behavior management and all the stereotypes about kids with autism fell away. People with autism are not all brilliant at math, or have some extraordinary ability or talent, or need 24/7 support or none at all. These are valuable lessons about other people, but one valuable lesson I learned about myself is how to control my own emotions. There were countless days where a patient would throw a toy at the wall, hit me, not make it to the toilet, have an hour-long tantrum, etc., but ABA therapy does not allow the behavior technician to react.
ABA Therapy is based on the idea of solely using positive reinforcement, meaning praising and rewarding the child for engaging in positive behaviors. There are no time-outs. There are no punishments. No yelling. No losing privileges. So instead of reacting to what is happening, the behavior technician can only respond to positive behaviors from the child. This has forced me to remain calm and non-reactive during my work life and my personal life.
One specific struggle I think of was my study abroad program in Italy. Pre-pandemic, my weeks in Italy were full of so much growth and so many challenges in which I used my skills from ABA therapy to remedy calmness in myself and others. When traveling, nothing ever goes entirely right. From being told my plane was canceled, to missing trains, to being in an apartment with seven strangers, I was constantly faced with ever-changing plans. I learned to go with the flow more and that no reaction is the best reaction. Just as in ABA Therapy, I switched the focus to positivity in these situations gave me a new perspective and helped me embrace change. My plane being canceled allowed for more time in a different county, missing the train led to a less crowded ride later, and being in an apartment with seven strangers gave me some of my best friends.
The critical element of my experiences in ABA therapy and studying abroad is that each time I reacted only positively, I embraced changes with ease. Remaining poised and in control of my emotions has empowered me beyond belief. Especially before starting as a behavior technician, I was reactive and had the mindset that other people made me feel a certain way. Now I have realized I choose how I want to react, and remaining calm and unbothered has given me the mindset that I control my emotions, no one else. Ultimately, people can do things that will make me upset, but reacting with calmness and class is something no one can take away from me.
