Creating Boundaries And Letting Go Of Things You Cannot Control
By Kathryn
Setting good, healthy boundaries has always been difficult for me. I find myself wanting to please everyone around me just to feel empty at the end of the day. Setting healthy boundaries allows for personal freedom, especially from the expectations that society has forced us to fit into. Freedom from doing things we truly do not want to do, and freedom from taking responsibility for other people’s actions.
Setting boundaries allows you to hold you - only you - accountable for how you are feeling. But setting boundaries is so much easier said than done, as it takes practice, patience, and determination. You’ll likely fail a few times at first, and feel the consequences, but you can choose to grow from these mistakes or to let them define you.
When you find yourself falling short of your expectations one day, don’t be so hard on yourself - practice self-compassion and recognize that you tried your best that day, which is all that matters.
What do boundaries look like? How do you set them?
Understand that setting boundaries takes PRACTICE, and you'll get better at setting them every time you do it.
The purpose of setting boundaries is to decide what YOU want to get out of an experience. You get to decide the role you’ll play in any situation. It’s not about controlling someone else’s behavior.
Boundaries set a hard line of what you WILL AND WILL NOT ACCEPT.
When you set a boundary, only YOU are responsible for yourself. Anyone who responds to this boundary is not your responsibility.
When setting boundaries, it’s important to STICK to them regardless of how a person RESPONDS.
Experiences impact how you feel about yourself. Take a second everyday to ask yourself - “Can I change this situation?” If the answer is “no,” find ways to change your actions, and trust the process.
